He’d only gone up the road to get me some coffee and him a Sunday paper. He should have been back by now. When he was late I knew then that I had messed up. God had withdrawn from me  because I had lust in my heart . Then the rains came. Flooding rain so bad that sink holes were eating vehicles and families. I was terrified that I’d caused this somehow by deciding to stay the night with him at his home far away from my mother’s house.  I hadn’t stayed anywhere except with mom since I came home, and I needed permission from the parole people. Permission granted I went forth into what I thought was to become Noah’s flood for the second time.

When Jan Cordele was gone more than two hours I became very worried that he was hurt somewhere. Then I figured he’d call me. I’d learned by this time that everyone carried a phone with them. Even I had one now. I found mine and called Jan only to discover it ringing under his pillow!  Now, I was frantic. I went all through his house looking out every window to see if I could see him coming. I didn’t know what else to do.  My mom was over 45 minutes away and wouldn’t drive in a drizzle, much less a downpour. So she couldn’t help us. What to do, I didn’t know. So, I decided to see if there was anything to eat.  Food seems to be the comforter when no one’s around. Though in truth, it should always be the Lord. It would be if we’d let Him. He’s always just standing by waiting on us.  I ate and I prayed. Then I prayed some more.

Finally, Jan walked in looking literally liked he’d been drowned for a long time. There was not a dry part of him, I’m sure. He looked like an angel, though, bringing me coffee. He held it out for me and I took the soaked container and set it aside while he started drying off. He walked all that way home with a giant umbrella in one hand and a Starbucks coffee in the other. Looked like that coffee and umbrella were the most important things in the world as he handed them over. He was the most important thing to me now. Poor thing, his truck had broken down.

He knew I was distraught and asked me what was wrong. I looked around at the downpour and thought about the now broken down truck, and said “really, you don’t know?”. He was very perceptive and said, “Do you think you’ve let God down?” And I said, “Yes. I’ve stayed overnight with a man I’m not married to, will most assuredly have sex soon, too, and that will disappoint God even more because now I’ll have gone against everything I said I wouldn’t do because God has been so good to me over the last 14 years, that I owe God my allegiance, my heart. And I want to give that to Him always. And I’ve seem to have suddenly transferred my loyalties to you, who I love. But you’re not God and I must love God first.” Then I started crying because I knew then that I’d lost this man who I was very much in love with because I now sounded like a religious fanatic.

To my intense joy he held me and said that it was alright because since we love each other so much, we’re already married in the eyes of God. I knew that wasn’t quite right even though I’d never been married before, I had read the Bible and I knew what I believed.  A little while later, as the rain let up some, we walked back to try to get the truck.

The truck still wouldn’t start so we had to get a wrecker. Jan saw that I was still distraught over our predicament, so he went around the truck and opened my door and pulled me out into the rain, which was now a slight drizzle. He professed his love for me under the open sky. These, he said, are our vows professed in love which are Holy in the sight of God. After I’d said something like “yeah, OK,  you’re my husband and I’m your wife”, the sun came out for a moment and we saw a rainbow. It was as if God really was smiling on us. And truly, suddenly, I felt my repentance was accepted and that we were forgiven now to go in peace.

There aren’t hardly any public phone booths anymore nor can you find a phone book. So, we called my brother Lester who found us a number to call.  The wrecker came and my God, it was the most beautiful truck I’d ever seen. It was a huge flatbed shiny thing that was fully automatic. That truck must cost as much as a house, I thought. I asked Jan how we were ever going to afford this truck and why couldn’t we just have gotten the regular kind, you know the kind that pulls your car. This thing was for race cars and other high profile vehicles, I thought. He just laughed and said they’re all pretty much like this now. I was amazed.  We rode in that magnificent vehicle to the NTW where we left Jan’s truck. Then the tow truck driver drove us home in that beautiful chariot. It was incredible. And the sun was out.

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One Response to Our Flooded Bliss (10) By Edna Merle

1. LadyPoetica says:

July 15, 2010 at 2:45 am (Edit)

I always think of a rainbow as a sign from God that the storm has passed, and that He’s smiling down at us saying now things are going to be ok. When that rainbow appeared that day it was just for you and Jan!! It was God’s way of saying He approved

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